A sloth and a tree spirit - Chapter 1

01

Midnight.

Lin Sen stared hungrily at the beautiful young man who was asleep on his bed. He lifted the quilt to stir his boyfriend awake. He groped his behind. Nothing worked.

Su Lan was in deep sleep. His face in slumber was as beautiful as a painting under the glow of the warm yellow bedroom wall lamp. Lin Sen couldn’t hold back. He turned over and pressed in, held the presumably soon-to-be-hard possession in his hand. He bit Su Lan’s small white ears and whispered, “I gotta do you.”

Su Lan issued a cheerful snore.

“Wake up.”

“Zzzzz…”

Lin Sen pressed the sleeping beauty in his arms under his body and posed as much as he wanted. But there was no reciprocation.

He felt lonely.

Lin Sen gasped, “Baby!”

“Zzzzz…”

He gripped Lan’s hand and pulled, “Call me husband.”

“Zzzzz…”

Lin Sen was in a hurry, he felt the unreleased tension. “Ugh. I want you.”

“Zzzzz…”

He slammed the table, “Damn I want to divorce!”

“Zzzzz…”

02

Lin Sen took Su Lan to the bathroom, cleaned him, and took him back to the bed. Then he also took a shower. After returning, Su Lan was still asleep. He grew more upset. Su Lan didn’t even move his head while in sleep.

Lin Sen turned him over. He feared that the mat would squeeze his face.

“Zzzzz…”

The indignant Lin Sen had to bring this matter up. He posted his problem on the forum at night.

“What should I do if my wife sleeps for twenty hours a day. Waiting for an answer.

Excuse me, my wife sleeps for twenty hours a day, and spends three hours eating slowly and one hour to take a shower.  She has no time for me, what should I do? What to do!”

1st floor: Hahahahahahahaha!

2nd floor: Hahahahahahahahahaha!

3rd floor: Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

4th floor: Hahahahahahahahahahaha!

Lin Sen got angry: Excuse me? Is it that funny? Don’t you care about my feelings?

26th floor: Lin Sen, does your wife have narcolepsy? I recommend you to take her to the hospital for a diagnosis.

27th floor (Lin Sen): Thank you friend, but he has no narcolepsy. He is very healthy. It is natural for him to sleep for a long time.

28th floor: It must be narcolepsy. How can a healthy person sleep for so long every day? Is your wife a sloth?

29th floor: Hahahahahahahahaha a sloth!

30th floor: Sloth!

31st floor: omg sloth!

32nd floor: lmao an irl sloth?!

Lin Sen took his anger out on his phone: Yes! My wife is a sloth!

Miao:

Chinese Social media uses words like floors, landlord, upstairs, downstairs in online posts etc. 

Any post on the internet is called a building. 

Landlord: the person who posted it. 

Each reply is equivalent to building an additional floor.

1st floor: 1st reply. 

2nd floor: 2nd reply and so on..

The replies are arranged in chronological order from top to bottom as floors numbers. 

Sometimes they use names like ‘sofa of fifth floor’, or ‘table of second floor’, ‘bench on the third floor’, and different names to maintain distinct identity in a conversation.

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